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What is pain? Pain is physical suffering or discomfort caused by illness or injury. I can actually say, I have experienced pain, as many of you have. The pain, I experienced had me where I didn't know whether I was going or coming. It broke me down to the point, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think, I couldn't sleep. The truth of the matter, I didn't want to live. When I lost my grandmother on September 3, 1990 my world seemed empty. The one person that carried the family was now gone. I didn't know what to do, she kept the family together. On June 20, 1997, 7 years later, I would lose my son. The pain was too unbearable. I wanted to take my life. If you have ever lost a child, you know what I'm talking about. But little did I know, April 12, 2004, 7 years after losing my son, I would yet experience another heartache, the lost of my dad. The first man, I ever loved, the man that couldn't do wrong in my eyes, the man that told me how much he loved me, was now gone. Death was knocking at my door 7 years apart. We all know, seven in the Bible means completion. But God wasn't done with me, the process of breaking me was just the beginning. There were death after death in my family on my mom and dad side. Dead was coming so quickly, I became worried and fearful. I was diagnosed with anxiety. Anxiety is another word for worrying. Five years after losing my dad, on September 09, 2009, my mom was diagnosed with this horrible disease called, Parkinson. Five in the Bible means grace. This disease affects the nervous system. My mom was strong, she was dealing with it, while trying to be strong for her family. My husband helped me a lot with my mom. On February 16, 2016, my mom lost her baby sister. Around about 7 years from when my mom was diagnosed with Parkinson. I had to be the one to deliver the news to her. She was never the same. She not only lost her sister, but her best friend. On April 20th, 2016 this was the making of my beginning and the shedding of my old. Two month after the death of my mom sister, my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. He was given 3 to 4 months to live. He transitioned on August 29th, 2016. In the, Bible 2 and 4 combination is a sign that you will have help from Spirit and Angels in making your desire transition. So, now you're wondering why am I talking about all this and its significance: 1. My life was already predestined for me. 2. God knew actually how to break me without destroying me. 3. He couldn't use me without a testimony. 4. He knew I was strong enough to endure the suffering. 5. He knew He could trust me with the oil. 6. He knew the pain would bring me to Him, instead of me turning from Him. 7. He knew I would take up His cross and follow Him. Before you can be used by God, you must be afflicted, know down to your lowest, so he can raise you up His way. I had to die to my old ways and take on His ways. I could have turned to drugs to numb the pain temporarily, but I chose permanent and that was